Friday, June 8, 2018

Fred Rogers, I'll Be Your Neighbor

Fred Rogers on the set of "Mister Rogers Neighborhood"  (Jim Judkis / Focus Features)

When my daughter was a preschooler, even as a toddler, she loved to draw and paint (she, in fact, grew up to be an artist). I still remember one day as she was using her markers and large poster-sized paper which she had laid out on the floor. With some large, rather abstract sweeps, she said, “This is Mister Rogers. He has long arms.” I was glad to see my daughter thinking of Mister Rogers in her creative moments.  I could not help thinking as well that Fred Rogers did indeed have long arms – figuratively as well as literally. He reached so many people in positive ways during their formative years.

Won’t You Be my Neighbor? is a new documentary about Fred Rogers that is coming to theaters this weekend. I look forward to seeing it. Just as I was happy to see my daughter fondly thinking of him all those years ago, I am also quite grateful that Mister Rogers is being remembered now, 15 years after his death.

If you look to the top of my blog page, you will see a “Heroes” tab. If you go to that page you will see a list of heroes, and Fred Rogers is right there at the top of the list. There you will see the essay I wrote in 2012, which I share again below:

Finding Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood


One of the happy asides for me that came with being a father was having the opportunity to visit Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood.  As soon as my daughter was old enough to pay attention to television, we started tuning in to Fred Rogers’ program on Public Television. In fact, for all of my daughter’s pre-school and early elementary years, TV viewing for her was limited to PBS children’s programming, and a few other children’s programs at places like The Discovery Channel, Nickelodeon and on video tape.

Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood, however, was the best thing ever developed in children’s programming. It was something my wife and I always enjoyed watching with our daughter.  Once my daughter started preschool, I began taping Mister Rogers. I found that I could get a week’s worth of programming on one VHS tape (this was before TiVo, DVDs, etc.). That way she (and I) were able to watch the show later if the broadcast was missed. We loved the pace of the shows, and parents could learn about interacting with children by watching how Mister Rogers talked to children and what things he chose to talk about with children.  

I learned some things myself about zoos and aviaries, about how graham crackers are made, how poets deal with words, and how musicians ply their talents, and many other fascinating things from Fred Rogers’ field trips.  Above all, it was reassuring to watch him and understand that I could make it as a parent in spite of my doubts and worries about whether I could get this parenting thing right.

A self-actualized person

Fred Rogers may have been one of our best examples of a healthy, well-rounded life  a self-actualized person.  The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines self-actualization as “to realize fully one's potential.” It is a term coined by psychologist Kurt Goldstein and also used by psychologists Abraham Maslow and Carl Rogers.  It carries the connotation that one is living fully within one’s potential and has made full use of that potential. Once I was taking a graduate course dealing with developmental psychology and the topic of self-actualization was discussed. The instructor asked us to name some examples of people who were self-actualized.  Since I had spent some of my daughter’s formative years watching Mister Rogers' Neighborhood with her, I immediately put Fred Rogers' name to the class as one whose life was a prime example of self-actualization. The professor had a look of surprise, then of awareness. “I think he is a good example," the professor said. "Usually in class students will mention names like Jesus Christ, the Buddha, or Mahatma Gandhi, but Fred Rogers is certainly a good example of what we are talking about.”

A good neighbor

Fred Rogers was definitely a gift to all who encountered him, whether in person or on television.  He showed us how to talk to children and he taught us how to be a good neighbor. You can read another writer’s reflections in an article, “15 Reasons Mr. Rogers Was the Best Neighbor Ever.” There is also a wonderful video on You Tube in which John D Boswell (melodysheep) has done an auto-tune digitalization for PBS of some wonderful moments with Mister Rogers. You can see that delightful and inspirational video below.





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